(This is my ugliest picture....it's a picture of my parents spooky house this last Halloween. My brother in-law dressed up to scare all the kids. It's not a super high quality photo but doesn't the blur just add to the scariness?)Sadly it's true....I'm getting older. I feel like I spent my childhood always wanting to move to the next step. When I was twelve I could stay up longer. When I was thirteen I could pierce my ears and wear makeup. When I was 15 I would go to high school where all the cool people were. When I was sixteen I would be able to drive, etc.
Now that I am an adult I have decided not to live in the future anymore. I have found that life is so much better when I take each day as it comes. It has taken me a long time to come to this conclusion but I think I am finally there. Although, it would be nice to be done with this last math class :)!!!
Many of you know that Paul and I have been seeing a doctor for infertility. I'm a pretty private person so I like to keep my personal life to myself. This last week I found a blog that is written by a chain of fertility clinics. As I read stories about other women I felt like it would be good for me to say it out loud. So here I am....I assure you, this post is not about me complaining. I would never give up these few years I have had to become closer to my Heavenly Father and his Son Jesus Christ. I would never give up the relationship that Paul and I have developed through just being there for each other. And lastly, I would never give up the time I have had to truly find myself through going to the temple every week with my parents.
Today was my first time seeing a fertility specialist. I was a little nervous for obvious reasons. I knew it would just be more poking and prodding. I was right, but I also received more answers and Paul and I walked away with a little more we can grab onto . I would be lying if I said that I wasn't scared, but when has that ever stopped me from doing something.
I'm sure all of us are a little scared when walking into something new. So here I go....wish me luck!
And I wish you good luck in all the new things you will experience this week!
4 comments:
Living in the 'now' rather than the future is a good thing for me to remember! Thanks! I'm so sorry to hear about your fertility struggles. It took us about 2-2 1/2 years to get pregnant after seeing multiple docs, etc & I know that it is tough! If you ever need to chat or have any questions or whatever, feel free to e-mail me! Loves! jillymrob@gmail.com
We too know a little of what you are going thru.. our prayers are with you. ...(be careful what you pray for...ha ha cause you may get it) :D Love you guys!!
Best of luck. We're praying for you.
You are amazing. That is SO hard. Good luck, I hope everything is going well!!
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